Unlike other methods of leaving criminal verdicts up to fate, this one probably had more cynical motivations. See, the people running the show had quite a bit of leeway in terms of deciding what counted as “healed” or even what constituted floating, and if they were pretty sure you didn’t do it or even if they just liked you, they could say “Eh, looks healed to me” or “He sank three feet, drowned enough.” As with most things in life, it was all about making a good impression.
Witch Cakes
We’re not talking about those cute little cupcakes with pretzel rod legs and chocolate shoes that pop up in bakeries around Halloween; this kind of witch cake is actually more disgusting than those sickly fondant messes. It’s made from a batter of rye flour mixed with the urine of those claiming to be cursed or whatever, baked, and fed to a dog because anyone who’s ever been within nipping distance of a Pekingese knows they’re in league with the devil. These weirdo bakers then watched the dog to see if it showed any symptoms of being cursed — though again, depending on the dog, that could prove difficult — and if it did, some indication from the dog of who did it.
It’s unclear how long witch cakes were a thing before the Salem witch trials because obviously, that nonsense was bound to come up again. It’s entirely possible Mary Sibley was one sick Puritan who just made it all up. Whatever the case, she suggested it to the Parris family after their daughter and niece began exhibiting the bizarre behavior that kicked off trials, instructing their slaves in a cooking tutorial even grosser than the ones where middle-aged white women dump food on their counters.
Of course, nothing happened, but weirdly enough, Sibley didn’t come under any suspicion for her knowledge and encouragement of supposedly occult practices. She was only briefly suspended from communion for “going to the devil for help against the devil.” Meanwhile, the slave who actually baked the cake, Tituba, became the first person accused of witchcraft in the Salem witch trials. For baking the cake. Moral of the story: Never help anybody.
Top image: Nate Neelson/Upslash
![Disclaimer](<a href="https://rebrand.ly/LazadaSalePh"><img src="http://getfreefollowers.net/images/lazhorizontal.jpeg" /></a>){kind=link}
0 Comments